


longin' for shelter from all that we see

by hotchners



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: F/M, Gen, M/M, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-14
Updated: 2020-10-14
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:07:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27004795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hotchners/pseuds/hotchners
Summary: a relationship would only risk everything you had together. after a difficult case, you decide that maybe you don’t care all that much.
Relationships: Spencer Reid & Reader, Spencer Reid/Reader, Spencer Reid/You
Kudos: 51





	longin' for shelter from all that we see

**Author's Note:**

> title taken from ‘we’ve got tonight’ by bob seger. thank you for the love on the last fic :)

It was unspoken amongst the team.

The connection between yourself and the resident genius just seemed to appear one day. Nobody blinked, it just seemed to fit in some inexplicable way. Spencer was the harsh waves crashing against your calm, sandy beach. Unable to exist without the other and balancing in a way that brought peace to the chaos of your jobs.

The only comments came in the form of questions.

Why don’t you just bite the bullet and sleep together already? Was a particularly crude one from Garcia after a few cheap beers. You asked the same question to her about a certain hunky profiler without a second’s hesitation, which ultimately ended her teasing.

Spencer and you had never discussed it, but you both knew it would never work. It was a fatal symptom of the business you were in. Relationships were tested, people became hostile and tempers were pushed to the edge. The last thing you wanted was to part ways in a few years, bitter and without the only other person who brought a semblance of comfort into your lives.

Instead, you shared shoulder brushes and inside jokes. Him, picking up your favorite lunch on his break. You, swiping the last sprinkled donut from the break room and depositing it on his desk without a second thought. Hands lingering a moment too long, eyes lingering even longer.

-

The most recent case had been a hard one. It was the taunting, you decided, that got to you the most. The letters to the police station, the signatures so clear and apparent, but the killer still just out of the BAU’s grasp. There were over a dozen bodies before there was a breakthrough that finally led to an arrest.

An arrest meant a win. But as you delivered the news to families whose daughters would never be home again, never sleep in their beds or eat dinner at their kitchen tables, it felt like anything but.

The plane ride home was quiet, everyone winding down in their own way. Usually, you would be reviewing case files in the silent corner with Hotch. As the newest member of the team, you knew you had some catching up to do experience wise and crammed for the next case the way a senior crammed for their final exams. Eyes growing heavy as the cities passed beneath you.

For once, you sat lonely in the front of the jet. Blanket wrapped around your shoulders to shield bare skin from the artificial air conditioning, knees pulled up to your chest. Your eyes had been trained out the window since takeoff, when Emily asked if everything was alright and you had been quick to brush her off.

You felt the seat beside you dip with the weight of a new body. You didn’t have to turn back to know who it was.

“Hey.” Spencer, of course.

“Hi.” You sighed, tucking the blanket further beneath your chin.

“Emily won’t say anything, but she’s worried about you.” That caught your attention.

“Just Emily?” You turned from the window just in time to see a sheepish shrug overtake his shoulders. That was another unspoken rule between the two of you. You never asked the obligatory ‘are you okay?’ that seemed to be never ending from everyone else. It went hand in hand with the never lie to each other rule. That question only ever bred lies.

“Hotch, too. Think you might have a secret admirer, actually.” That deserved the huff of a laugh, your head falling into his shoulder.

“This one just sucked; you know?”

“I do.” His head fell on top of yours. “Want to come over?”

A tradition. With particularly difficult cases, Hotch usually let everyone get at least a day of rest as paperwork needed to be filed and more cases needed to be reviewed. You and Spencer always used this time to your advantage, typically in the form of naps on his lumpy couch or quiet afternoons as you wordlessly cooked dinner in your cramped kitchen together, Spencer reading through that morning’s crossword.

“I think I’m just going to head home, actually. My bed is calling my name.” You both knew you wouldn’t be getting much sleep.

-

It was raining by the time the jet landed. You and Spencer were huddled together under a Bureau issued umbrella, heavy steps splashing into deep puddles on the walk back to the office.

It was quiet as everyone collected files from their desks, Penelope gushing to Emily about a well-earned bubble bath as they walked out together. Spencer offered you a final glance as you lingered by your desk, absentmindedly shuffling through papers and photographs of the last case.

He knew you would be fine by the next case; you always were. Back to your happy go lucky self who made bets with JJ and did the best Hotch impression, brows drawn down in a fashion that made even Hotch crack the smallest of smiles.

Spencer had only been home for fifteen minutes when the knock sounded at his door. Browns furrowed, he subconsciously reached for the holster still clipped to his belt. He tiptoed over the shoes he had kicked off, socks sliding against the smooth hardwood of his living room.

He stole a glance through the peephole and threw the door open without a moment’s hesitation.

“Y/N?”

“Hey, boyband.” You were dripping wet, hair heavy with the rain and coat seeped through. Your head knocked against his doorframe. Spencer couldn’t place exactly why, but he knew this visit was different from all the others.

It was in your eye, he decided, as they refused to break contact with his. Your bottom lip was worried between your teeth, hesitant to reach for the one thing that would give you comfort in that moment. Would it solve all of your problems, you wondered, to reach forward and kiss the boy you had loved for so long?

Your love for him reached bounds you never knew it could. To lose him after years of searching would match that amount with agony.

“Can I come in?” He knew what you were asking. You knew he wouldn’t say no.

He stepped aside, offering both his apartment and himself to you. His lock clicked behind you so loudly in his still living room. You took a breath before turning back to him.

Without another word, his hands were cradling your face, pulling your lips to his so quickly that your noses knocked together in his haste. At least you’d have tonight, you decided as you pushed back with equal enthusiasm. You could worry about tomorrow and beyond tomorrow.


End file.
